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Crappy Album Covers #192 — Non Sequiturs and Weirdness

Let’s see if I can figure this out … Dusan Reljin Fischerspooner wears a top hat (of the vaudeville variety) attached to a metal cage extending the height of his forehead; the hat is somehow connected to two bungee cords which also are tied to hs neck; and finally the top of his hat […]

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Crappy Album Covers #191 — Slightly creepy

I am not sure why it matters that a record album be advertised as “full color” high fidelity, but that is the kind of thing that comes with this compilation of “Rock and Roll Party Oldies and Goodies”, I suppose.

I am not sure which is dorkier: the guy hopping up and down and […]

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Crappy Album Covers #190 — I Can’t Count

Hiroshi Uchiyamada (1936-2006) and The Cool Five are a Japanese group that proves that not knowing how to count is not merely a symptom of brainless white North American schoolchildren anymore, if it ever was. Determined to smash through Oriental stereotypes (after we sing a tune, join us for some Calculus!), the Cool Five […]

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Crappy Album Covers #189 — Faerie Dust

This is likely a late 70s release from the Hungarian prog rock group Omega. If it makes you feel any better, there is a 2002 album by them called Time Robber where they are all dressed in black.

This is supposed to be spacey and experimental and the cover makes it look like some […]

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Crappy Album Covers #188 — Sex Education

The sexual education of our young is the one touchy point in our society. And whether parents are really saying the right things is what worries counsellors and psychologists all over the world.

 

Look at the father on the left presumably talking with the young boy. Hopefully, the father is not “showing him […]

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Crappy Album Covers #187 — Food on Vinyl IX

Welcome, Ladies and Gentlemen to the sub-series that never ends! FOOD ON VINYL!

Martha and her ugly sister greta were in bed sleeping when they were awaken by a rumbling outisde their room. They followed the rumbling to the kitchen, when, suddenly, they were attacked by snacks! Marauding hamburgers, with evil eyes, flying through […]

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Crappy Album Covers #186 — A Parent's Horror

A parent’s horror: Ukuleles. On tour, no less. Pay admission, you get to hear a whole orchestra of them.

 

Few people can make a ukulele sound good. This is an elpee’s worth of toons from a group of classmates, possibly from Halifax, by Order of Canada recipient J. Chalmers Doane and a group […]

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Crappy Album Covers #185 — Family Bands II

Available for $21.00 on some websites, this 1977 album features siblings Rick, Jack, Toby, Jill and Carrie who hail from Minneapolis, and according to Bizarrerecords.com (click on image) they still are performing as grownups. Comedians John and VickiJo Witty are here with their album called “Family Portrait”. Not sure about their style of humour […]

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Crappy Album Covers #184 — The International Language of Bad Taste V

In the multilingual universe that is the international CAC-o-sphere, we see three guys with pasty complexions and one chick sporting skin tones of a living being.

Honestly — do we have to see the pasty complexions twice — once again in their reflections?

A direct translation of the title might be uninformative, but “Look […]

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Crappy Album Covers #183 — Chixdiggit!

What is the problem with this picture? It would seem as though, despite all of the efforts of these four lads to entice the two swimsuit-clad young ladies to join them (hell, what lady wouldn’t be impressed four guys wanting to form a human pyramid?), there is a major logistical problem: There are only […]

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Crappy Album Covers #182 — Something Missing

Former trucker Vance Edwards should know better than to pose in front of a trailer without the requisite truck. And I, along with many other bloggers in the CAC-o-sphere question the use of unintelligible yellow patches on eithr red or blue clothes. The electric guitars and keyboards that could not possibly be plugged into […]

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Crappy Album Covers #181 — Plainness, overdone

Currently selling on E-Bay for about 15 bucks, Bobbi Jean White’s album “Higher Ground!” shows Ms White sporting the bouffont she was well-known for.White had been singing gospel since she was a child in Georgia. She had recorded dozens of albums either solo or with other groups, then became a radio announcer beginning for […]

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Crappy Album Covers #180 — The standards and the classics

Elva Miller (1907-1997) made her claim to fame with purposefully bad Ethel Merman imitations where she sung songs from the Great American Songbook out of tune, along with many other kinds of well-known songs.When Mrs. Miller “Does her Thing”, I think the message here is that it is time to run and hide. You […]

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Crappy Album Covers #179 — Strange Cowboys

No idea who this cowboy wannabe is, but Gercei Camargo’s idea of being a cowboy — and a singing one at that — is to wear something strange over his nether region (looks like a kilt with a cushion) and frilly pants over his cowboy boots. Sharon McNight’s “Another Side Of” was likely released […]

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Crappy Album Covers #178 — Why they have trouble getting laid

Red candy stripes on men’s suits was one of those fleeting styles for maybe a month or two in 1975, before someone, somewhere said ‘wtf’, and the style became passe, if it ever was de rigeur.Maybe he really does want to work as a volunteer candy striper at a hospital. I still think he […]

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(Images may be disturbing) Crappy Album Covers #138 — Food on Vinyl VII

This is the last (I promise) of the Herb Alpert parody covers I have.

Jabberwocky is an audio montage troupe in the tradition of Negativland and Plunderphonics. All these folks use spliced audio sequences and multi-track audio in order to make social commentary on media, popular culture, sexuality, war, and religion.

You can download […]

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Crappy Album Covers #137 — Food on Vinyl VI

Here is the Lawrence Welk organist Bob Ralston, who while trying to be Alpert-esque with the album lettering, has still managed to do this album cover without being covered in food, to his credit.

Judging by Ralston’s youthful appearance, this album probably dates to about the same time as “Whipped Cream”. “Sweet Cream and […]

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Crappy Album Covers #134 — Still more frickin' sunshine

Frickin’? Friggin’? I wish they had a dictionary for the correct spelling of expletives.

Lillian Southard Robinson looks like a kindly enough elderly woman in the picture. The kind that would give an extra quarter to the paperboy, and who would visit shut-ins twice every week. In the middle ground of the photo is a […]

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Crappy Album Covers #133 — Hicks from the sticks

Felix Lorentz will sing your requests whether you want him or not. He comes out of his shack near the lagoon to the bar in the nearby village and rips the mike out of the hand of the entertainer that was scheduled to arrive, and yells out “I take requests!”After a few moments of […]

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Crappy Album Covers #132 — More happiness

Another album cover which has been fodder for the CAC blogs, “Return to Oz”, from a Leo Sayer wannabe named Dardy. If anyone can tell me something biographical about Dardy, drop me a comment. This dynamic fun machine also produces happiness. Every home should have one. This one has a flat tire, so it […]

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