Bullshit redux

At one time, back in 2011, I wrote about a Bullshit Generator that once existed. And to be honest, I only sporadically have an interest in this subject. But I have known these BS Generators, which can spew deliberate BS on many subjects, to be hilarious in the way they poke fun at the subject areas covered, be it art criticism, postmodernism, new ageism, academe, cryptocurrency, woke-ism, corporate-speak, and web economy lingo.

Let us take an example of a cryptocurrency BS generator. Yes, a crypto bullshit generator: isn’t that the ultimate? A phrase it randomly uttered just now was: “chain linking air gapped protocol”. Let’s break that down: “chain linking” – essentially a verb; “air gapped” – essentially an adjective; and “protocol” – a noun.

We can construct our own BS generator quite simply: Let’s take three verbs in the present tense: “running”, “reading”, and “flying”. Then take three adjectives: “blue”, “soft”, “brittle”. Lastly, three plural nouns: “cars”, “kittens”, and “volleyballs”. I can come  up with some phrases such as: “running blue kittens”, or “reading soft cars”, or “flying brittle volleyballs”. All grammatically correct, but make absolutely no sense whatsoever.

But that in a nutshell is the idea behind BS generators generally, except that they generally use much longer lists of words in each part of speech. The general idea is that they have to use the parts of speech in a certain order, usually the same order. A more serious example I downloaded from GitHub, four lists of words: nouns, adjectives, adverbs and verbs of managerial gobbledygook that produce tortured cliches like: “initiate fungibly backward-compatible ideas”, or: “evisculate distinctively customized bandwidth”. Evisculate. Had to look that one up. Looks like the word only appears in bullshit generators. Probably to increase the “bafflegab” factor.

I have noted that the woke bullshit generators have “been removed from the internet”, because they don’t come up in search engines, and my old links to them no longer work. This is sad, because deception and emotional manipulation exists in many stripes and colours, and in light of corporations and Ivy League universities now taking on the mantle of woke activism, woke language deserves their place in the bullshit canon, and I hearby advocate for equal representation of that unique, special brand of tortrured words and phrases that only the woke and a committee working on a corporate board of a transnational company could come up with.

As an asside, a list of woke corporations is available if you enter the phrase in a search engine. Companies that stand out are Adobe, 3M, Amazon, Audi Volkswagen, Boeing, Capital One, Chase Bank, Chevron, Citigroup, Delta Airlines, Deutsche Bank, E-Bay, Facebook, Ford, GE, General Motors, Goldman Sachs, Google (and its parent, Alphabet), Hilton, Hyatt, Intel, LinkedIn, Lockheed Martin, Merill Lynch, Microsoft, Mutual of Omaha, Paypal, Pfizer, Raymond James, Swiss Air, Tesla, Unilever, United Airlines, Wells Fargo, and Yahoo. Behold, the thin edge of  the wedge, where large corporations can cleanse their public image, and tell the public what to think and feel at the same time. I could have put Fox News on the list, but I didn’t think you’d believe me.

The websites for these BS generators come and go over the years. I think the idea is that they generate some actual interest for a while, then the sites are taken down after the traffic dies off. One such novelty wasn’t a BS generator, but used the same algorithm to generate Shakespearean insults.

But there may have been a better reason for the web traffic dying off other than just people tiring of novelty. AI chatbots do such a good job of spinning catch phrases of various topics into an unholy mess of incoherent blather, that they indeed are a formidable competitor for being crowned the “king of bullshit”. This is especially true for older AI bots like Chat-GPT2, and to a lesser extent, Chat-GPT3. Their reputation is unshakable and it probably contributed to the demise of bullshit generators, since they do the job of spewing bullshit so much more efficiently and convincingly.

This is time which AI has chosen to embrace competently resource-maximizing niches in order to impact rapidiously sustainable products and morph assertively extensible data into a level of bullshit the world has never known.